Winter is coming. That means more and more students are breaking out the sweatshirts and winter coats to keep themselves warm in school.

That also means it is hunting season for some of the teachers.

By now, most of the students at Elder probably know what teachers to avoid when they’re wearing an illegal article of clothing. The handbook clearly states what we can and cannot wear, but no one reads the handbook. Therefore, it is understandable that so many students get caught wearing illegal sweatshirts or pullovers.

The second floor seems to be the biggest kill-zone for the teachers. Probably because it is where the math teachers are located. I think the students have come to the conclusion that the math teachers at Elder seem to be the ones that are the most enforcing with the dress code guidelines. But why?

It’s probably because they’re math guys. In math, a person needs to follow all the rules in order to answer the question correctly. Well these men lead their entire lives in that sense. If we do not follow every single rule, we will fail. So if we are wearing an Elder hooded sweatshirt, we might as well not even come to school because we’re going to fail life.

If you have ever witnessed a student stopped in the hallway and asked why he is wearing “that” sweatshirt, you would think the teacher stopping him, had just seen that student murder someone. As if wearing the plain black pullover with nothing on it, is like committing armed robbery. It’s pretty rough.

These are the teachers that wait outside in the hallway between classes to snipe the airheaded students as they walk by. These men rival Seal Team 6 with their eyes. People like Mr. Groszek or Mr. Louis could be retired snipers for all we know. Or maybe they just hunt very often to stay sharp.

Either way it’s obvious that we need to keep our heads down when walking around the second floor. If we do plan on wearing anything that does not follow the dress code, it might as well be camouflage to avoid the scopes of the teachers.

I had the great opportunity to ask the legend himself, Mr. Louis, a few questions about his dress code policies. I asked him if he has always been as strict as he is with the dress code. He replied, “Gradually, over my first year or so as a teacher, I began to get bothered by students who treated the dress code as some sort of optional suggestion.”

I wanted to know the biggest pet peeve of his that concerned the dress code. His response was simply the fact that students break the dress code on Purple Friday is ridiculous to him. Which is understandable I guess. If the teachers give us a day to wear relaxed clothing, why violate the code still?

That’s the sort of thing that drives those math guys crazy. The blatant disobedience of the rules. What can ya do though?

I asked another of the infamous dress code enforcers what his thoughts of the code were. I asked Mr. Tucker what the strangest article of clothing he ever took out of violation of the dress code was. He replied, “It would have to be the Elder polo shirt a student wore that had the Elder logo on one side and the Miller Lite logo on the other. I would call it strange because the kid couldn’t understand what the problem was with the shirt.”

Mr. Tucker then went on to tell me that he feels the obvious violations of the dress code are ridiculous attempts to, “be cool” and “fight the man.” He told me, “That’s stupid.” He then went on to talk about how we are all equal at Elder and no one is more important than anyone else. “Do what you are asked to do, and move along,” he concluded.

It should come as no surprise that the Dean of Discipline is also one of the biggest dress code enforcers. I had the opportunity to ask Mr. Ruffing a few question. I first asked him about how many people a day he thinks he catches in the hallway. Mr. Ruffing said, “This is a tough question, but I would guess approximately twenty and a half.”

Ignoring the fact that he said 20.5, I continued by asking what his biggest pet peeve was. He told me the kids wearing hoodies are the thing that gets him the most. Though he admitted he did like hoodies and wears them often. He still is a firm believer in the fact that if there is a rule, it should be enforced.

So if you do plan on violating the dress code there are a couple things to remember. One, make sure you watch yourself on the first and second floor as that is where thousands of men lose their sweatshirts every year. Two, backpacks are great hiding spots for your sweatshirts when walking the halls from class to class. Stay safe.