It’s all about the beards

Its all about the beards

The Boston Red Sox are the 2013 World Series Champions after defeating the St. Louis Cardinals four games to one. The Red Sox will certainly be celebrating their victory for the foreseeable future, but last year at this time the Red Sox fans were angry at the players and management after a disappointing last place finish in the AL East. What changed? Some people would say the change in personal or at manager pushed the team into the championship. I disagree. The thing that pushed them over the edge and into greatness was their beards.

This year following in the footsteps of the Boston Bruins, they grew large bushy beards to help them bond and play better baseball. Johnny Gomes who was credited with starting the hairy chins in Boston had a three run homerun in game three, and all that power has to stem from this former Red’s beard. The beard dominated the playoffs and the season and I hope to see them out in force next season.

I reached out to some of the Elder administration about beards. Mr. Bill once had a beard but he emphasized, “It didn’t look good”.

“I was dating an older girl and wanted to look older.” he continued. “She was 21 and I was 20, and the day after we broke up I shaved it.” I asked him if it gave him any super powers like how it gave Boston incredible baseball skills and he said “the ability to see through trees”.

Mr. Schlomer’s goatee was next on my list. He has had his since 1999 and the reason he kept it was “because my wife wouldn’t let me shave it”. I asked him what super power his beard gave him and he said it made him smarter.

Beards are indispensible and every male should at least try it once in their life.